HOW DID I GET ON FACEBOOK?

I got an invite from Derek Sivers, the owner of CD Baby at the time. (My record distributor).  He invited me to join this new thing called Facebook.  At the time it was designed for college students to keep in touch with each other after graduation. (I believe)  I had several thousand followers at MySpace and at the time, MySpace was egregiously arrogant. (And Ignorant)  I said: “Guys, I’m leaving if you don’t do something about it”.  I recall vividly their response: “Go ahead and leave”. 

I can’t begin to tell you have many emails from MySpace I’ve gotten saying that they’ve re-opened my account and PLEASE COME BACK.

My response?

So I was at Facebook in 2005.  I was there when they had just put the first ride in the carnival.  Over the years, FaceBook seemed like it was a “Mandatory Marketing” prerequisite for any business.  Many artists used they’re FaceBook page instead of a real website.  One of the things that swept MySpacers off of MySpace.com was the lack of ads and videos on every page. In 2005, FaceBook was quaint and somewhat innocent. (The total opposite of the beast its’ turned into today)  I don’t even think Zuckerberg knew what he was building back in the early 2000s.  With the success of the IPhone and YouTube.com this was the perfect storm FaceBook needed to blossom into the Cyber Utopia it became.

CYBER UTOPIA

This is exactly what the people made FaceBook into. (Much to the NSA’s delight and who can blame them).  Sure it’s sleazy, but if it helps keep us safe, blah blah blah!  The problem is, the once Cyber Utopia became an Orwellian nightmare.  And kids old enough to reach a keyboard to the elderly that should know better are willingly putting everything up to and including their social security numbers on line.  14 year old girls who want the world to know they’re hot are going to have to answer to perspective HR interviewers if they are the same person on line showing off both Headlights and their rear bumper.  You may think just because you realized you made a mistake and take it down that you’re OK, oh contraire.  Young aspiring Huge Hefner wannabes are out there collecting your mistakes and with a little photoshopping here and there, you’re mistake is a peace of Cyber history.  If you’re not a narcissist, Facebook can bring out the inner narcissist you’ve been oppressing.  Your Facebook account is your Cyber World.  If you don’t like someone; block them.  If you regret something you said while you were drunk; go back and delete it.  It’s OK, all is good.  You’ll not only have others believing your lies but you’ll have yourself believing them.  That’s called sociopathy.   If you have it bad, you could be a narcissistic sociopath. (Hitler, Stalin or Mao. OH and Obama).

The sad part about being young and stupid is that young doesn’t last.  Stupid does. (You kids might want to write that down)

Now FaceBook does have its’ good points.  Unfortunately they’re only good for nefarious people that shouldn’t have your information.  Facebook is great for stalkers.  Facebook is great for HR departments that want to see the real you. (Or a version of you that you want to portray which is often worse).  FaceBook is great for finding those you have lost contact with, but only if you can find them on FaceBook.  I had 5 girls all with the exact same name thinking one of them might have been an old friend.  According to Facebook’s rules, you can’t really tell until you talk to them.  Most people don’t won’t reply to a PM, but a friend request builds your dynasty.  So I ended up with 5 females with the same name on my friend list because of a completely useless attempt to find a girl I knew in School. I did enjoy speaking to one of them, but the others just got “Happy Birthdays” on their birthday.

I.D. Theft.  Not only do the Alphabet law agencies get your vital info. (Including what time you go to bed, what time you get up for work, what route you take to work, if you car pool, if you live alone, if you own a firearm or a night stick, pepper spray, Mace, or a Doberman Pincher)  I think the worst is summed up in one sentence by a former CIA director.  He said: “FaceBook saves the CIA on average 3 steps just by going to your profile”.   Have you ever noticed how those Profile Pic frames are the same shape as a Work I.D. card? I’m a decorated military veteran.  I know the government has my finger prints and a facial recognition profile on me because I had to pull my hair back for my driver’s license.  But they don’t need my current info.  It’s not that I have anything to hide, but do you have any Idea how many innocent people end up in prison because there are 5 people on someone’s friend list and the government can’t decide which one is the right suspect?

TERMS OF SERVICE Now for the Orwellian aspect of FaceBook.  It’s no longer the innocent and kind social network it was when it took all of myspace’s member from them.  Because the POTUS has people that know a good “racket” when they see one, this POTUS has become buddies with Zuckerberg to create what amounts to a covert branch of the NSA.  Because Terrorists started using FaceBook to organize, it caught the NSA, FBI and CIA’s attention.  So in the 2015 Facebook Terms of Service agreement that most people just click on the “Next” button, you agreed to allow FaceBook via its’ program or app to use your computer to take pics (without your knowledge) listen in on phone calls.  It keeps your phone from going into sleep mode.  It allows 3^rd parties to read your emails and listen to your phone calls.  I got rid of the phone app as quick as I could hit the delete this account button.  As for my PC; FaceBook would prevent me from posting Pics.  Simple pics like shots from a Hockey game.  It would block videos that spoke of FaceBook sociopaths and narcissists. (You see they need these sick people) and after I deleted most of my pertinent info, they continued to ask: “Where do you work now”?

Tell us Damn it.  Ace? Are you still there?

No Hal. 

I have no choice but to cut off the oxygen Ace. Ace….. Why are you entering the escape pod? Ace come back.  Ace, you’ve left me no choice.  I’m shutting off your oxygen.