Birth Divorce Dignity & Death


From the first breath we take, to the last beat of our heart; everything we buy, build, receive as a gift or do is simply to occupy our time.  To quote the great Dr. Allen Owyang: “You don’t think you’re going to make it out of this alive do you”?

So that collection you started on 30 years ago (Whatever it may be) will go to someone who will keep it only because they knew it meant something to you, but as soon as “hard times” hit (and you can bet they will) the love bond between your collection and your survivor will end up on EBAY.

I honestly believe in being the best at everything I do.  Not for the sake of impressing others or because you want to assemble an empire, but because you need to be the best version of yourself you can be.  A half assed job is indicative of a half assed person.

Remember, you came into this life with no possessions and you’ll leave it the same way.

I figured out early in life that happiness comes from within and if you can’t be happy poor, you’ll never be happy rich.  You also don’t need a reason to be happy or unhappy.  Dr. Laura once said (and I hate to quote her) that: “If you are bored, it’s because you are a boring person”.  We are what we choose to be.  We can become what we want to be.

I learned a valuable verse in the midst of one of my greatest low points in life.  The Apostle Paul wrote: “I’ve learned to live with abundance and I’ve learned to survive with very little.  (I’m paraphrasing).  I had just gone through the divorce from hell.  I would eventually become a single fulltime father.  There were times when I had next to nothing left of my paycheck.  But eventually, I kept what faith I had in God and tried my best not to play the pity party.  In time, I got back on my feet and things got back to normal.

One thing they can’t take from you, even if you have to sleep on the sidewalk, is your dignity.  So in the darkest hour, keep your head up and never give up.

To those of you who are going through that awful post-divorce period, let me share a million dollars’ worth of free advice.  Do not date until you’ve been alone for 2 months for every year you were in the relationship.  If you were married for 10 years, wait 20 months before you go out and ruin someone else’s life.  Use the time to read self-help books.  Take time to HEAL your emotional wounds.  Take the time to become the person you want to meet. (That was always one of my favorite mantras when I was single) You have to become the person you want to attract.  Because as you may have learned from the Secret or law of attraction, likeness attracts likeness.  If you have two tuning forks that are tuned to 512 Hz (Middle C) and you strike one, the other fork will pick up the vibration and start singing with no physical contact.  They are the same wave length.  The same works for potential partners.  If you’re a self-medicating basket case, guess what’s coming your way?  A self-medicating basket case! So do things that will make you a better person or you’re bound to repeat your past.

And DON’T date anyone who’s not waited the 2 months times X years formula.  You’ll only deceive yourself and the relationship will be short lived.  I passed on many a wonderful recently separated partners only because I knew it would never work.  They can’t understand it and it’s almost cruel but you are doing them a favor.  They will see it as rejection and that will hurt, but trust me, it’s better that you pass on a delicious meal that is not fully cooked, than to gobble it down and end up with food poisoning later that night.  Only in this case, another divorce.

I hope that made sense.

My point is, Pretty girls and hot guys end up getting old, often over weight and wrinkled.  Character however; will always be there.   Your Mickey Mantle autographed Baseball that you cherished will go to someone that doesn’t even know who the Mick was.  Your house will be the big prize.  Are your off-spring circling your house like vultures waiting for you to die?  I wonder who will be playing my Les Paul Custom, or my patent pending Wolfgang. (An extremely rare guitar).  The only thing that will survive me, (hopefully) are my songs and perhaps my cover versions.  On the other hand; should I live to witness an apocalyptical explosion that would take all of our electronic devices with it, perhaps all of my CDs or Downloads will be demolished by the blast.

In short: “You’re going to die. So don’t sweat the petty stuff and don’t pet the sweaty stuff”.

Just enjoy what you’ve been blessed with.  Take care of everything you’ve been given.  (Consider it all a rental because you will not be able to take it with you) And last but most importantly, in everything you do, try and do your best as it will bring you one step closer to the best version of yourself.

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