Pron is the juvenile code word for PORN. I wanted to spew my opinion on pornography. First of all, what is porn? Is nudity porn? Not always. It’s like that saying “I can’t describe it; but I’ll know it when I see it”. Porn is so ubiquitous today, it surrounds us. From the Superbowl to prime time TV, you can’t tune in to anything without having some woman’s cleavage shoved in your face.

My mission statement, especially within this blog, is to try and offer ideas that will make this world a better place.  Simply put, porn is not good for society. Porn has no redeeming value. And the collateral damage from porn is often irreparable. Let me pontificate:

1. Porn desensitizes us to reality. By doing so it makes us insensitive and often disrespectful to the opposite sex.

2. Porn demeans the photographed. Some may think that Marilyn Monroe was art. Images of her in “Some like it hot” can be considered art. Perhaps this was the beginning of our society’s death spiral. But what you don’t see, is an industry that exploits immature girls for a few bucks while the producer profits millions. What’s even worse is that our culture is continually condoning the introduction of porn into our society. “Girls gone wild” should be retitled “Girls gone stupid while embarrassing their parents and ruining their future”.

3. Porn is an addiction for some that is driven by huge profits. It’s worse than smoking. Smoking will eventually kill your body. Porn will kill your soul. Now before you think I’m turning evangelical on you, let me explain. We are a culture of teenagers raised on “Sex and the City”, and “Desperate housewives”. Most teens have computers. Most of these computers are not filtered by parental guidance, meaning ANYTHING is available. So the only thing a person gains from viewing porn is more desensitization and a misguided belief system that most women are like porn actresses. This desensitization ruins the social interaction between males and females when they find themselves in “real” situations. They’ve been educated like Pavlov’s Dog into seeing sex for the physical stimulation only. And like other endorphin releasing stimulants, it’s hard to break away from once you’ve started. Especially for the teenage boy that’s just discovered this private “E” ride. (Disneyland reference)

I was however; shocked to be viewing an episode of CSI, when the conversation of sex without love came up. Grissom says “Sex without love is sad, it makes you feel the opposite. It makes you feel lonely”.

The “Sexual revolution” of the 60’s turned Sex into a handshake. It’s a shame because Boys see having sex as a form of “manhood”, while Girls see sex as “Love”.
Since Al Gore invented the internet (tongue in cheek) Rape has almost doubled in many communities. As a matter of fact, between 1998 and 2001 Rape tripled in the state of Oregon. Is it possible that after a night of drinking and snorting Meth, internet porn just doesn’t do it anymore?

We live in a quick fix society. A time of drive thru restaurants, drive by gang violence, Express commuter lanes, High speed internet service, abortion rates that make the holocaust look like a freeway pile up. We want it, and we want it now.

But the best things in life you still have to wait for. It’s going to take 9 months to see the healthy smile on your child’s face. It takes 162 games, plus 2 rounds of playoffs before you get to watch the world series. And a relationship that grows out of mutual respect and adoration will last much longer than two people that just decided to “hook up”.

Don’t believe me? Get slam drunk every night for a month. Then lay off alcohol for a month. Then see how good just one glass of Cabernet Sauvignon tastes.

Saturation is the enemy of Appreciation.

Nobody Knows you (When you’re down and out)

Once I lived the life of a millionaire, Spent all my money, I had not one care Took all my friends out for a mighty good time Bought bootleg whisky, champagne and wine.

Then I began to fall so low Lost all my good friends, had nowhere to go. I get my hands on that dollar again, I’m gonna hang on to it till that old eagle grins.

Cause no, no, nobody knows you When you’re down and out. In your pocket, not one penny, And as for friends, you don’t have any.

When you finally get back upon your feet again, Everybody wants to be your good old long-lost friend. Said it’s mighty strange without any doubt,Nobody knows you, Nobody knows you, Nobody knows you when you’re down and out.

(Lyrics by Jimmy Cox 1923)

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Why is it that money can make or break a person or a relationship? Often times it’s totally out of your hands. But if you’re steadily trading hours for dollars, then you’re accepted. Nothing shows you what your relationship is like until you lose your income.

Ironically, win the lottery and your friends come out of the woodwork.

So why shouldn’t man have a “love” for money?  It’s true. Money can’t buy you happiness. But poverty will buy you a whole lot of loneliness. You could be the nicest guy in the world but lose your job and you’re among the “unfortunate”. I bet it was easier when my ancestors were killing animals for survival. Nobody could take away your bow and arrow. But now, we do things the “White man” way. You have 3 choices, Work for the man.  Work for yourself by starting your own business, or work the system.eg, welfare, food stamps and section 8 housing.

All 3 have major drawbacks.

Working the system has no future.

Working for someone else has a dismal future

And working for yourself takes balls.

As more jobs get “outsourced” to China and Asia, the unemployment rate will continue to rise.

The Bible preaches: “The Love of Money is the ROOT of MANY Evils” (this is always misquoted) But in our time, money is no different from air, water, food and shelter. It’s a need. I don’t have a “love” for air. I don’t have a love for “water”. But take them away and see what happens. The same can be said for money. The response time is just longer. People have committed suicide over money. The biggest cause for divorce is money. (either making it or not having it) People are in jail for not paying the government their share of it.

It goes on.

What’s my advise? Be a Millionaire. Read some Wallace Wattle books or Napoleon Hill books, but make as much of it as you can get your hands on. Remove the word greed from your vocabulary; and I’ll tell you why.  If you’re in a position to make honest money, a lot of it, do it.  Don’t stop when you think you have enough. I’m not saying be a miser. Give 10 percent away. But make all the money you’re capable of making.

Why?

Read the lyrics above again.

Monogamy vs. Polyamory

With all due respect to those of this community that practice “polyamory”, the principles of infidelity in a two person relationship is flawed.  When I say a two person relationship, I mean two people that have come together under the law, come together under their god and come together under the same roof.Going outside of the relationship for your intimate needs lessons your relationship because you’re not getting the most out of what that relationship has to offer. People usually cannot see the beauty of what their partner has to offer because they’re more concerned with what their own personal needs are or that their partner doesn’t know what pleases them. (Me, me, me)

That’s a lack of communication and respect.

If you are in a conventional two person relationship, and your S.O. wants to go outside the relationship for things that were reasons for entering the exclusive two person relationship, eventually there will come a time when one or the other says: “What’s the point of being trapped in this fake relationship”?

What’s the point of living with the same person, when you’re dining and sleeping with someone else? What’s the point of sharing financial responsibilities if one party is spending the disposable income on entertaining someone outside the circle of intimacy?

Why not face reality; divorce and be free to see as many people as wish as often as you wish?

The reason is:

Deep down inside; we want someone that we trust to be there.  We want someone who will race to the emergency room when all hell has broken loose. We know that two people that “cleave together” live longer than those who live alone and use other people for social stimulation. We know that the bond between two humans is so great than when someone in an LTR dies, the survivor usually follows 2 to 6years later.

We know that when you live with someone long enough and are truthful and respecting of them, it makes you a better person. We learn more from exclusive relationships about ourselves if we’re open minded enough to look inward and see what it is we’re doing or not doing.

Anyone can put their best foot forward in a date. But this person could be someone entirely different 18 months later.

Speaking as a musician; I’ve dated more people than I can remember. Seriously!  Strangers have come up to me claiming to have slept with me years ago. It’s embarassing and sad to a point.