WHY LIBERALS HATE CONSERVATIVES

BECAUSE THEY HATE THEMSELVES

66ème Festival de Venise (Mostra)

Now let me be clear.  I am not suggesting that all liberals are Joseph Stalin, or Michael Moore.  Last Sunday I did and article on THE LEFT’S TREATMENT OF PRESIDENT BUSH.   I will say that the margin of extreme liberals are larger than the extreme conservatives.  Simply by nature, conservatives don’t want to be extreme about anything.  That’s why they’re called conservatives.  Liberal by definition means “More”.  As in MORE government.  But let me get to the root of liberal ideology.  Liberals are almost always waging an inner war within their souls.  The sad part is, they don’t realize it.  But because they can’t come to terms with their inner conflict, they are quick to engage in vile, vitriolic behavior.  (Not letting the facts interfere with their rant).  Winnie (Winston Churchill) whom I loathe quoting once said: “If you’re not a liberal in your 20s you don’t have a heart.  If you’re not a conservative in your 40s, you don’t have a brain”.

There in lays the root of why liberals hate conservatives.  Conservatives claim to hold themselves to a higher moral standard than the liberal.  This also explains why when a conservative backslides, the liberal media is quick to show hundreds of slow-motion replays like when a president gets shot on film.  I say I am not painting all leftists with the same brush, but you can certainly paint a majority of liberals with one wide brush.  Unfortunately you can paint the fringe lefties with a slightly narrower brush.  It’s a principle as well as a scripture from the Bible that “darkness” hates “The light”.  Conservatives have come to the conclusion that it’s easier to live in the light than to go through life hiding your indiscretions.  This is another reason liberals hate conservatives.  If you happen to be gay; chances are it’s your self imposed shame (and society to a certain degree) that makes you want to be a “liberal”.

HOLLYWOOD LIMOSINE LIBERALS

The difference between a Hollywood millionaire and a self-made former blue collar Millionaire is that one feels guilty about his or her millions while the other feels thankful for his or her “success”.  Again, the inner self hatred needs to be dealt with.  (That’s if they have a conscience).  If not, they just pretend to be social liberals yet like Michael Moore, will talk crap about Halliburton yet invest in it.  But most actors want to come across like they care for the little guy.  It let’s them sleep at night.  But if you’re an “Occupy Wall Streeter”, don’t you dare pitch your tent on Barbara Streisand’s front lawn. (Out side the gate of course).  They will have you removed like an old piece of furniture. The smart Hollywood star will respond: “I’m really not into politics”.

FINALLY THE HONORABLE LIBERALS

There was a time when the Democrats championed civil rights.  This was after decades of being pro-slavery. Remember, it was a republican that did away with slavery.  Talk about hypocrisy; while President Johnson was getting us deeper and deeper into the Vietnam War (M.I.C connections) Martin Luther King Jr. was endorsing the anti-war movement.  Dr. King said he didn’t want to get involved in war politics, but was forced to take a position.  He tried to side step the issue by saying the money that was being wasted (Not to mentioned the young Americans)on this “conflict” could be used for social programs.  But that’s one of the left’s dirty little secrets.

Still, there were those who meant well.  I was a big supporter of Bobby Kennedy.  Bobby saw the injustice of racial discrimination and was not afraid to address it.  Yet I believe that today, both Bobby and Jack would have been considered “moderate republicans” (Romney comes to mind)  Those who actually picked up their cross and marched in Selma with Dr. King risked their lives for the cause.  In 1967, the war for civil rights was won.  Many of the liberals who championed the cause were now “Out of work”.  What followed was the worst kind of politics perpetrated on America.  The race baiters like the Jesse Jacksons and Al Sharpton (who never marched with Dr. King).  The ACLU which was once a righteous organization lost its’ purpose.  Without the us against them paradigm, the Left has to create the  adversity it once fought against.  Income inequality is being served up by this president as a travesty.  Yet he never mentions it when he campaigns in Hollywood.  (But I digress) We are seeing the Pat Caddells and the Doug Schoens standing up against the new “Progressives”.  These are people who believed in the message of human fairness.  If you want financial equality, go to Russia or China.  The old Democrats are starting to see what is going on in the 21st century DNC.  Even Juan Williams appears more like a WWE wrestler when it comes to playing the “Democrat” on Fox News.

THE AVERAGE LIBERAL CONSTITUENT

I think the average registered Democrat today falls into the group of kids that never did fit in.  Again, they haven’t quite gotten to the point where they want to be over achievers rather than under achievers.  I didn’t become a Conservative until I left the military and had to pay my own bills with no help from anyone.  So lower taxes meant more of my money in my modest paycheck that I got to keep.  I saw first hand how “Reaganomics” got us out of a huge recession with double digit inflation in the 70s.  I saw it work and from what I saw; minorities no longer had to sit in the back of the bus.  But the DNC in the 60s stood for equal “Human Rights”.  Today it stands for European socialism which is impossible because you run out of “other peoples’ money.  So it must convert on the national scale to communism.  (At least that’s what Karl Marx said)

BEATLES 101 FOR GREG

ON THE FIVE

BEATLES 101 for Greg

Gutfeld83

Greg Gutfeld who is usually the resident “Cool dude” on all things music choked on the topic of the Beatles.  He did give the band props for knowing when to call it quits and even Bob Beckel understood how the Beatles reinvented themselves over the years to stay “Fresh”.

But Greg, you need to know a few things about the Fab Four in the early years. (No I’m not going to talk about Johnny and the Moon Dogs or the Quarry men)  But Elvis was the King of Rock and Roll between 56 and 59.  He NEVER went to Europe.  Colonel Tom Parker, his manager, was afraid to fly.  On the other hand; Buddy Holly and the Crickets (Which is where the “BEATLES” came from) did tour England.  John was so infatuated with Buddy,

  • A. because of his music and production skills, and
  • B. Because John said Buddy made it cool to wear glasses on stage.

The first demo the Beatles ever recorded was “That’ll be the Day”.  Buddy had so much influence on the English music.  In fact, Buddy influenced the Brits so much that Brit Rock star “Tony Sheridan” was the first British musician to own a Fender Stratocaster, because of Buddy Holly.

The Beatles were in love with Holly’s music, but when they came to America they met a black Rock musician that influenced their music even more.  Little Richard Pennimen was the influence behind the Woooooo when the Beatles would shake their hair..

So when “Please Please me” came out, it was a hybrid of Buddy Holly and Little Richard.  This sold well to millions of young white kids. (See my article Beatlemania and the Stupid 8 year old). 

Paul felt the band was getting to old to sing: “I saw her standing there” and was responsible for the re-invention of the band in 67.  It was easy to see that Paul had the commercial sound while John truly wrote songs of substance; Poetry from the heart.  The song “Tell me Why” was a song that John said he wrote for children from broken homes. Paul was the teen Idol of the band and his original works show it.  In Lennon’s “How do you sleep”, John writes, “The only song you ever wrote was Yesterday”.  And even when he wrote that song, Paul was obsessed with writing a song like Simon and Garfunkel’s “Bridge over troubled water”.

Paul, after John’s death, would confess that great lyrics just rolled off of John’s tongue, where Paul had to struggle.  Ironically, because Paul was such a “Paul Anka-ish” bubble gum sell out; he had greater post Beatle success than his counter part.  But one can argue that Paul’s success was quantitative while John’s “Imagine” and “Woman” were far superior to anything Paul ever wrote and had greater “qualitative success.

Beatles

SPORTS, TV, MOVIES AND MUSIC

 SPORTS, TV, MOVIES AND MUSIC

Stories

It wasn’t that long ago that Americans sat next to a fire and the Dad told stories to the family for entertainment.  If you were fortunate enough to have books, you could find a place all by yourself and escape from the chores of being a hunter or a gatherer.

In Europe, entertainment had a head start and the same jesters that entertained the king would try and make a little extra bread (Literally) entertaining the peasants.  Centuries before settlers were making a noise with their harmonicas and banjos, Mozart was writing his symphonies and Bach was writing waltzes.

If you want to go back 2000 years before the American settlers; Plato and Socrates were writing the most profound thoughts, concepts and ideas about life.  Meanwhile on the Yucatan Peninsula, the Mayans were creating star charts, pyramids and one heck of a calendar.

Yet, if you take all of the knowledge and entertainment up to the 20th century from Bach to Hendrix, it would be a fraction of the inventions and life changing devices that would come out of a place in the South San Francisco Bay called Silicon Valley.

Cell small

Oddly enough, when technology came out of Mountain View California, it took several entertainment industries with it.  It changed the world and not entirely in a good way.  Every form of entertainment can be put into 5 gigabytes of memory on a phone, the thing that use to hang on your wall.  In the mid-1990s, record stores started going out of business.

About the same time, the price of a theater ticket went from $3.50 a show to almost $10.00 for a movie that would be on home video in 3 weeks.  Of course in 1980, cable TV was in almost every household showing movies that had been released 3 months earlier.  It also was the new venue for boxing events.

MTV  Buggles

 

 

 

In 1980, Radio, (Both A.M. and F.M.) took big hits as “Music Television” (MTV) broadcasted music videos 24/7.  Radio no longer had the audience it once had as the video was more fun.  Unfortunately, as the Buggles sang in the very first MTV video broadcast: “Video killed the Radio Star”.  Now people could see what Joe Jackson looked like.  This was not necessarily a good thing either as some of the greatest writers and singers were really unpleasant to look at.  It also gave those who were blessed with good looks a chance to charm young fans in spite of their “auto-tune” voices.  It also raised the stakes of being a Rock Star.  You couldn’t just have a good song, good looks and you had to have a good video.  Many weak songs were driven by great video production.

VHS

Then 1985, 80% of the country owned a Video Cassette Recorder as the price dropped from  $700.00 for a crappy top loader, to about 250.00 for a new Sony front loader.  Soon Video Rental stores popped up.  You could stay home and make your own popcorn for 50 cents and buy a six pack of soft drinks for under 2.00 dollars.  Now that theater popcorn (with the yellow saturated 30 weight oil) and your big gulp will cost you about 12.00.  But you could now watch movies in your underwear and drink alcoholic beverages in the privacy of your own home.

sandlot

Kids use to wait anxiously for the 3:30 bell in school to race home and grab their ball, bat and baseball hat.  A bunch of kids would meet at the park and play 3 flies up.  Or you would go over to your friends’ drive way and either play one on one hoops or “Around the world”.  If you didn’t have friends, you could go to the handball court and play tennis with yourself. (against the wall).  Kids got plenty of exercise before the machines.  Now they race home to see who’s on their favorite server to play a point and shoot video game.

Flat screen

Speaking of Sports, almost all of the sports took a big hit with modern technology from “Steroids” to the large Flat screen”.  It was recently discussed in a panel on television about being at the Super Bowl versus watching it on TV.  It was no contest.  Most of the panel enjoyed the modern television’s first down and line of scrimmage markers as well as inexpensive but better Nachos over sitting in the cold with 60,000 screaming drunks.

bogie-hot-dog

Humphrey Bogart

Personally, when it comes to baseball, I agree with Humphrey Bogart: “A Hot Dog at the Ball Park taste better than a steak at the Ritz”.  I might add, now days they cost about the same.  My only complaint is having 7 to 8 people touching my food before it gets to me.

tv_hockey

Only one sport is not meant for TV.  That sport is Hockey.  It has nothing to do with the “ambience” but everything to do with camera angles.  You just can’t see what is “about” to happen while watching hockey on TV.  I will admit that replays of the goals are a nice touch and most if not all hockey venues have a replay screen.

Now you can watch music videos on your phone with the YouTube App.  You can watch a whole hockey game on your index card size screen.  You can book a flight and a rental car all from the same index card size screen.  I can get a 10 day weather prediction from the Weather Channel App.  And of course if you want, you can get porn through your phone anywhere you can get a cell tower signal

Fundawear  Physical Sexting.Sexting

Now you can actually have virtual sex.  A company has created special underwear that enables your friend to call you on your phone and the phone will send a signal to sensors near the “Intimate” parts of your body causing a sexual response.  I think that says how far our culture has come and gone. (No pun intended)

matrixcnsunplugged Neo_Matrix3D_big02

We are quickly heading towards a “Matrix” culture.  We no longer exercise our bodies or our imagination.  We care to much or not at all about our appearance.  Our “Profile Pic” has become more important than our wardrobe.

Personally, I think it will be most entertaining should an EMP (Electro-magnetic-pulse) explode in the atmosphere and everyone be forced back into the physical world and have to survive by hunting or gathering. (The Wild Wild West V.2)

Einstein

Einstein once said: “Imagination is more important than knowledge”.   He was a smart guy.

HEROES

HEROES

Heroes

When I was growing up my Heroes were Elvis, Willie Mays, Kenny Stabler, Bobby Kennedy, Juan Marichal, Mike Smith (Dave Clark Five), Jimi Hendrix, and lastly Rick Derringer.

Willie was every kid’s Hero if they played Baseball.  The others, besides Elvis, Stabler, Kennedy and Jimi might be a bit obscure.  But that’s not the point.  My point is, having Heroes is not necessarily a good thing.  Joe Montana doesn’t want you running up to him on the street, or interrupting him at dinner for an autograph.  Sure, he won’t say no, but just think how rude it is.  In fact I would say don’t have Heroes because more than likely they’re not Heroes, they’re Idols.

Murphy

Audie Murphy WWII Hero

True Heroes do things that do not make sense under normal circumstances.  The Firemen who raced into the Twin Towers to bring as many people out, those are Heroes. True heroes are servants.  True Heroes are people like the late Audie Murphy.  If you get a chance watch his Movie “Red Badge of Courage”. It tells the story of how a small soldier took it upon himself to rush the enemy and in doing so, he neutralized 3 Nazi Machine Gun nests.  When asked why he did it, he responded like most Heroes: “They were killing my friends.  I had to stop them”.  That’s a HERO.

York

Sergeant Alvin York WWI Hero

Alvin York also known as “Sergeant York” was the WWI American that captured a whole squad of the Enemy and marched them back to his lines single handedly.  Again, York, who tried to get out of the draft because he was an “Objector” and found it against his Christian beliefs to kill.  When he was awarded the the Congressional Medal of Honor he was ask how an objector could be a war hero.  Again he responded: “They were killing us and I had to do something”.  Most true Heroes are “Reluctant Heroes”.

Role models are another thing.  In music, if you’re a serious player, you have admiration for many professional players.  When you become a professional, you can hear the influences of your role models.  But Heroes? No.  I’ve had the fortune and misfortune of meeting many of my Hero/role models.  Many I was able to talk to as one musician to another.  Some acted like it was an honor for me to be in the same room with them. (Did I say that right)?  I don’t want to drop names, but I will say that Neil Young, Edgar Winter and in spite of  what a grouchy old bastard he comes across to the press; Dick Dale (The King of Surf Guitar) is one of the nicest mentors I’ve ever met.

I guess what I’m trying to say is: “Don’t put Hero status on anyone”.  Like I said above, most true Heroes are reluctant Heroes, they just know what has to be done and they do it out of courage and/or compassion.  Most Heroes don’t enjoy being Heroes.  The father that stays in a miserable marriage for the “Sake of the Kids”, I consider a hero.  Especially if he gives up a better woman and perhaps a better paying job.

Idols, on the other hand, are merely a disappointment waiting to happen.  I don’t know how many times Willie Mays struck out with the bases loaded. Jimi Hendrix gave me the foundation for most of my solos, but a hero?  No, he died choking on his own vomit.  Kenny Stabler?  He was quoted in 1977 as saying he beat Fran Tarkenton and the Vikings in the Super Bowl with a Hangover.

How come Barry Bonds, Mark McGwire and Sammy are still not in the Hall of fame?  They were Baseball fans’ biggest heroes.  If not for that damn HGH.  They weren’t heroes, they were biologically engineered freaks.  Even without the steroid scandals, they were merely entertainers.

Hero worship is Idolatry.  It’s not good for you and it is not fair to the person you are calling a Hero.  Sure it may be flattering to “Your Hero” at first, but once you realize they’re just flesh and blood humans that are unable to walk on water, they become just another person who will die someday.  I’m sorry to ruin your fantasies.

CHILDHOOD TRAUMA THAT LEADS TO ADULT PSYCHOSIS

“ABANDONEMENT SYNDROME”

Baby Ace

I don’t know why I’m on a Childhood memory thing.  But I wanted to share something with any of my handful of readers that might have lost someone dear to them at a young age.  It may even apply if you lost someone as an adult, but it’s a symptom of “ABANDONEMENT SYNDROME”.

This is pretty common amongst those who were orphaned at a young age.  But if you did lose a parent at a young age, for what ever reason.  Perhaps they died or just divorced your mom and left town never to see you again.  When you grow up, you’ll find yourself acquiring some odd habits.  The worst is trying to find a mate to take the place of your lost parent.  That’s a lose/lose scenario.  So to my young readers in your 20s or 30s, don’t push it.

mont

But I absolutely hate this bad habit which I’m told comes from abandonment syndrome.  If I lose something like a favorite ink pen. (Heaven forbid it be my Montblanc) Or as was the case tonight, I  couldn’t find my picture albums from when I toured in the early 90s.  I turned into Jack Bauer trying find it.  Seriously, I would shoot someone in the leg if they knew where my lost item was but wouldn’t tell me.  I’m using hyperbole but you get the idea.  People who have lost a love one, will stop the world and search for something they fear losing.  I won’t give up looking for something until I find it.  I have the tenacity of General Patton.

The logic behind this is that, the search for the lost ink pen or photo album gives the sub-conscious mind a feeling like it’s looking for the person you lost.  When your mom dies when you’re in 5th grade, your mind plays games with you.  You know you can’t bring them back, but the hunt or search gives your ID, (Higher self) the feeling that you’re doing something that you know is impossible.  The more you are emotionally attached to the object, the more rewarding it is when you find it but in a “Psychotic way”.

So If you’re one of those people who obsess over lost items and can’t sleep until you find it; I’ll bet you’ve lost a love one and it’s their absence that drives you to keep looking for the lost Item.  Think about it the next time you lose something.  Some people can say: “Aw it’ll turn up” but if you’re like me, it can be 10:00PM and you’re telling your spouse: “Don’t wait up for me, I’m going to turn the garage inside out until I find what I’m looking for.  Sadly, the more you miss the lost person, the harder it is to overcome this psychotic behavior.  It’s even worse if you were 10 years old standing on the curb watching your mom drive off in a car with all of her belongings.

BEATLEMANIA & THE STUPID 8 YEAR OLD

BEATLEMANIA MEETS AND THE STUPID 8 YEAR OLD

B-BEATLES GBH

I’m pretty sure it was 1964.  I had seen “A Hard Day’s Night” a dozen times.  (This was when you could go to the Matinee and stay all day).  All I knew was that The Beatles, The Rolling Stones and the Dave Clark Five were all you heard on the A.M. Radio.My family was one of those where the mom took the kids on vacation while dad stayed and worked.  (Gee some things never change)

Anyway, how much of an effect did Rock music have on me?  In 1964 my Mom and one of her friends took us on the usual trip, which went from Stockton CA, to San Francisco CA, then to Santa Cruz, down the PCH to Disneyland and Knott’s berry farm. Then from there we went to Ensenada Mexico for a few days on the Baja Beach. That year we spent a good half a day in the City.  We walked around what is now the financial district.  There was one shop on Post and Mission that had “Beatle Bobble Head” dolls.  My mom was in to much of a hurry to let us go in.  Sooooooooo, the next morning I got up around 6:00 AM.  Everyone else was still asleep.  I quietly put my clothes on and walked from the Sheraton Hotel on Van Ness Blvd. down one of the diagonal streets (Post or Sutter) to the little shop on Post street and Market.  The store was closed because it was only 7:30 in the morning.

SF Map

I just stood there and stared through the window and marveled at how cool these little Beatles were.

I was 8 years old and had NO idea of how dangerous (and stupid) what I was doing actually was.  But I had to see these Beatles.  I thought that maybe if the store was open, I could go in and beg my mom to take us to that store and buy me a Beatle. When I got back to the Hotel, I was in trouble.  I was in no position to ask for anything.

But thanks to McFarlane; 40 years later, I’ve got a John Lennon Bobble head on my wall.

John

ONCE THE SEEDS OF DESTRUCTION HAVE GERMINATED

court

THE RELATIONSHIP – AFTER THE PARTY IS OVER 

When did you know you didn’t love me”? She said: “I don’t know if I’ve ever loved you”.

                                                      ~ Billy Crystal as Harry in “When Harry met Sally”

He does all the things that you would never do. He loves me to, his love is true. Why can’t he be you?

                         ~ Patsy Cline

“My wife said to me as she kissed me good-bye: “Have a nice day”. That’s what the bank teller says to you. That’s what you say to a customer. Shouldn’t your wife tell you she loves you”?

                                                                                               ~ Jeff Goldblum in “Into the Night”

 “Now I’m praying for the end of time so I can end my time with you” !

                                                                      ~Meatloaf from Paradise by the Dashboard lights.

If the seeds of destruction are planted in the Motive of your marriage, it’s only a matter of time before you are in a relationship void of Eros (lust) Philia (sibling love) and maybe even Agape (a Divine Love). Often this relationship is the result of unintended consequences. Such as:

  • We got pregnant and neither of us believes in abortion.
  • I was not over so and so. ( I’m still not over so and so I thought they would change)
  • Kids will settle him down.
  • Maybe the financial situation will change.
  • I was in love with the feeling of being in love.
  • I’m better off as a single person.
  • I didn’t sew all of my “wild oats”.
  • They don’t make me happy any more.
  • They stopped filling my needs.
  • I wanted to show the world and my ex, that I am desirable.
  • I enjoy having someone to come home to.
  • It was pre-arranged by our parents.
  • I could do worse and I’m not getting any younger
  • I wanted someone to bury me.

Had enough ???

For the myriad of reasons to break up a marriage; I can only think of a few not to.

  1. Divorce is a sin and knowingly doing so would anger God.
  2. The other person needs me and I took a vow. (My word is important to me)

It all boils down to: “How serious do you take marriage”? NO MARRIAGE IS PERFECT. That’s a good thing to keep in mind.  And keep these principles in mind as well.

  • • People change.
  • Couples change.
  • The economy changes
  • Religious beliefs change
  • Physical conditions change.
  • Mental stability changes.
  • Some people cheat.
  • Some people are never satisfied with one sex partner.
  • People don’t like being controlled.
  • People can’t read minds so the ability to communicate verbally is unbelievably important.
  • BONUS PRINCIPLE: FUN DOES NOT EQUAL LOVE

Once you notice the seeds of marital destruction come to fruition and you hear certain “hints” like: “I want a divorce” or “Get out you pig”.  Understand that it could just be that person’s less than eloquent way of saying: “I’m unhappy and something needs to change” or it could really mean: “You’ve got to go”.  If you do not have kids; BONUS.  Be as cordial as you can, LEAVE, then think about what you want to do.

If you do have children, I would urge you to negotiate like Henry Kissinger until you’re just wasting your breath.  Sometimes we need to take one for the team.  Just because you got yourself into a bad marriage doesn’t mean the kids have to be drug through the awful trash of lawyers and asset divisions.  And the sooner you learn that you have as much to do with the break up as your mate, the sooner the name calling and ugliness will cease.  If the marriage has become abusive, by all means do what’s right because watching your parents fight can ruin you as badly as watching them separate.   It’s a Lose/Lose situation.

I said that you were as responsible for the break up as the other person who may be cheating; because you signed the dotted line in the beginning.  You made a poor choice.  More than likely, you didn’t take enough time to know this creature that was great in bed but awful in public.  Take responsibility for it and don’t play the “victim”.

The Seeds of Marital Destruction

Part 1 :

Newborn

“Why is it we never really know the moment that we’re in love; but we always know the moment it’s over”

~ Steve Martin L.A. Story 1991.

Steve wrote another profound line in that jewel of a movie that said: “Let us just say I was deeply unhappy, but I didn’t know it because I was so busy pretending to be happy all the time”. In many cases we pretend to be happy and openly accept denial. Pretending can be a good place when you don’t know Love from Lust, Greed from Need or just waiting to see what happens next.

The seeds of the destruction of a relationship are almost always planted in the motive for a relationship”

– Ace Andres 2011

(Example: “I married you because I thought I could change you”.)

I was instructed in college that everything we know about relationships is a child’s paradigm. If you were lucky enough to observe 2 parents treating each other with trust, love and respect; your subconscious mind made notes that it would later try and apply to your self-esteem, your social awareness and eventually your love life. Our first experience of love is when our mother holds us in a birthing blanket just after an obstetrician spanked the muconium off of our cheeks. That mother’s love becomes the bench mark or gold standard in which we will judge all others who attempt to win our hearts. (Up to a certain age)

The Bible instructs us to be fruitful and multiply.

At puberty, a funny thing happens. I say funny because puberty happened to me in front of God and His entire green earth. I was wrestling with an older girl that I was friends with. She was 14 and I was 11 or 12. She was a “Tom” girl but she was starting to wear a bra and real short cut-off jeans with slits up the sides. But I never saw her as anything but a “Buddy or Pal”. Until one day when we were wrestling on the ground and I got my first public erection. My goodness we both stopped and looked at each other? She smiled because she knew what was happening, but she also didn’t let me go because she was “older and smarter”. (Looking back, I think she enjoyed it)  I was embarrassed to say the least. For some reason, we never wrestled again after that.

Oh the innocence. But Love? Nope

Now an awful turn of events happened that would cast/spew it’s influence on my relationships forever. My Mother (My/everyone’s first true love) died when I was 11. That hand of compassion was gone. The person who kissed it and made it feel better was gone. So for 6 more years it was just my father and I trying to do our best in a small 2 bedroom apartment. After losing my “Bench mark” of love in 6th grade, it was a sea of chaos and confusion in high school. I wanted to find that hand of compassion, but 15 year old girls are no substitute for your mom and your widowed father is no substitute for the gentle hand of compassion.

It’s easy to see how the motive for love in any future relationships contained these seeds of destruction. Not only was I trying to replace somebody that loved me unconditionally, but I was trying to find it with someone that had no idea of what mutual love between two people of the opposite sex was. Even when I was older (in my 20’s) It seemed like I was dating for the specific purpose of finding someone to fill the loss of the Gold standard.

Unfair expectations to hold anyone to.

Sadly enough, young girls who have their self-esteem shattered by an abusive father (sexual or not) commonly plant the opposite seeds of destruction in their first boy/girl relationship as she will not be happy with anyone that doesn’t slap her around. I’ve dated women that couldn’t respect me if I didn’t mistreat them. (And I never would ) But going back to my opening line, our first paradigm of love is through the eyes of a child. We see our parents kiss, hug, hold each other, or slap, yell, beat, leave etc…… It’s all part of the garbage in and garbage out process we call relationships. As children; subconsciously we suck it up. We not only suck up what we see our parent do and say, but we are influenced by television, our culture, our friends, the Internet and of course Walt Disney.

SPEAKING OF SEX….

LF1

“The Physical Manifestation of Spiritual Unity”.

For me, I’ve always “tried” to define sex as: “The Physical Manifestation of Spiritual Unity”.  I”ve always told myself, I would never have sex with a partner that I wasn’t willing to legally father any offspring that should result in such activity.  That didn’t mean love had anything to do with the sex. (See the last quote on this article)

I believe I held true to that creed most of the time. (The math is impossible as I still have certain episodes of amnesia from back in the day) God was gracious and cut me some serious slack.

On the other hand, our creator endowed us with hormone secreting organs that would inspire us to procreate to keep the Human race from extinction.  I use to be proud of the math, now I’m sort of ashamed of how many women I didn’t love that I had sex with. (Or even knew their names) Ironically, the women I loved the most; I never had sex with.  How did that happen?  Oh I know, either they were married or I was married.

“Time can be so cruel“.

In the 60’s, the term “Free Love” became popular.  20 years later a term called “socially transmitted disease” became popular.  The truth remains “Free Love” meant nothing more than a sexual hand shake and like the Jersey shore; cheapened man’s values of that which might have been sacred at one point.

The next time you have sex; ask yourself if you are two spirits uniting through physical manifestation? (Or just fucking)

In an episode of CSI “Las Vegas” Grissom, (The lead investigator) once said: “Sex without love does the opposite of what it’s meant to do.  It’s sad.  It just makes you feel lonely”.